A Fashion Designer

There are a jillion ads for sports gear for women. Stretchy tights, snug t-shirts, special bras, and cute outfits for the young woman who wants to work out. The older lady has to settle for baggy sweat pants. Today I decided I would find something appropriate for my body. There was nothing. I decided to design something I could wear when I went walking because I need to take into consideration that I might get dizzy, trip or fall. Balance seems to be a problem as I get older!

"I ain't saying the customer service

in my bank is bad,

but when I went in the

other day and asked the

clerk to check my balance,

she leaned over and pushed me."

Anonymous

The first thing would be to find a helmet for my head. Something like a baseball cap but with a strong body. Knee pads on both knees because when I fall, it is usually my knees that hit the ground first. If I fall face first, I want a metal face mask and for my body a padded chest covering. I imagine that with all that protection I would be weighed down and would have to walk slower but with a certainty that if I fell my body would not be hurt.

As I pictured my protective gear I realized that not only could I go for a walk, but I could play catcher on a baseball team! Okay, I never said I could draw but you get the picture, right?

A man falls down a flight

of stairs and somebody rushes over to

him and asks, "Did you miss a step?"

"No," he answers, "I hit every one of them!"

Milton Berle