Following my last blog entitled
Do We All Have a Bit of Racism In Us, I remembered my prose poem written in 1979 and thought it would be appropriate for my blog today. I wonder if Lorenzo Sanchez could have been himself, without the outside world trying to change him, who would he have been? If he had been allowed to grow with no inhibitions and more confidence, where would he be now?
The Rape of Lorenzo Sanchez
A young boy in the 1940's
dark and slender,
was wooed by a cruel lover.
"Follow me," she whispered,
but, don't speak Spanish,
don't eat tortillas,
don't let those dark eyes sparkle,
don't hold your head up.
You are Mexican.
You are inferior.
You can't eat here.
You are dirty.
You talk funny.
You can't work here.
You don't belong.
You are Mexican.
You know,
you'd be better off
if you went back to the
fields where you belong.
You won't finish high school.
You're not smart.
You're no good.
You are nothing.
You are Mexican."
Lorenzo did not believe all
that was being told to him
but wondered if maybe
some of the things he
heard were true.
Lorenzo quit school,
quit eating tortillas,
tried to say chair instead of share,
changed his name to Larry,
didn't teach his children Spanish,
forgot his heritage,
could not understand his parents,
tried to belong.
Now,
Lorenzo thought,
I am what you want me to be.
I now fit the stereotype of what
you want me to be.
I've assimilated, become something
I am not so you can love me.
But,
Somewhere along the way
the lover could not get her fill of tortillas,
Enchiladas,
Tamales,
or the culture, the music, the country
of what Mexico was all about.
She taught her children Spanish
and shook her head, "What is the matter
with the Mexican?
His children can't speak Spanish,
His people drop out of school.
He pretends not to be Mexican
What is the matter with him?"
Lorenzo was raped.
His soul torn
and his mutilated ideals
were left by the roadside,
but he did not die.
Instead he learned,
I am a Mexican
born in the United States.
Some call me Chicano,
others call me Latino,
Mexican-American
or Hispanic.
I can learn,
I will learn,
I can be anything I want.
I am as good as anyone else
or as bad as anyone else.
There is no need to be ashamed
of what I am.
My heritage is warm,
colorful and beautiful
and sometimes tragic.
My music moves my heart.
I may have an accent,
but I can make myself understood.
We were here first,
My words are used by all.
I am what I am,
I will hold my head high,
I am proud.
I am proud to be Lorenzo Sanchez!
E. Moscoso
November 11, 1979