A Nephew From My Past

When you are in a family for a few years and then divorce happens, that family you interacted with, in some cases, continues to be your family. After my divorce, I continued being an aunt to my husband's nephews.  There were three sons born to my husband's brother and his wife. She was Italian and every Sunday she would prepare delicious pots of spaghetti and meatballs. Family and friends were always welcome. The kids would play together and the adults would eat.

I remember the three boys. The oldest was around ten years old; a cute child with curly dark hair.

The younger boys played with my children and I can remember many holidays when we would be together. As the years went by, the oldest boy continued through junior high and North High School.  By then I was no longer in the family and lost track of him. I would hear reports that he got married, worked in Blackhawk, had children and then an injury left him disabled. I saw him in 2016 and he had grown into a tall robust man. I noticed he used a walker.

His father, my ex-brother in law, called to tell me that his son had passed away. It saddened me
and I felt bad for the father because he had already lost the middle son to cancer. I had lost one child and that was painful enough so I could not imagine his pain of losing two children

 Saturday, June 9, 2018, there was a memorial for him at the Evergreen Elk's Lodge. I saw people from my past, met new persons related to the family, and spoke to the Father who in the two years I had seen him last had made a complete change. He had lost weight, had scabs on his forehead from having fallen down at his home, and used a walker to move around. It was difficult to see the strong man I remembered in such a sad state, even though he is
around ninety-two years old. Memories of seeing him on a soccer field playing his favorite sport, seeing him dancing at Latino dances, or seeing him surrounded by friends, laughing and joking, were at odds at how he looked at the memorial.

When two marines in uniform entered the room, there was silence. They walked to a memory table and picked up an American flag. It was a very emotional moment as they carefully and precisely folded the flag into a small bundle while Taps played in the background. The flag was presented to the daughter and only her sobbing could be heard as she hugged the flag representing the time when her father had been in the service. 

Different persons got up and spoke about the boy and the man he had become. It made me feel sad that I did not know him as a Marine, a lover of outdoors, a sports fan, a motorcycle rider, a father and a grandfather. Yet, I was present at his memorial with fond memories of when I did remember him.

May he rest in peace.