A Sad Farewell

At eleven this morning, December 17, 2018, I drove to Mt. Olivet Cemetery for the interment of my nephew. Even though I was no longer in the family after my divorce, I still considered the family to be my family. Whenever I would see my nephew he always called me Auntie. He passed away on November 1, 2018, was cremated and a mass was celebrated for him at St. Peter and Paul Catholic Church. There were over two hundred persons at the mass.

Today about twenty persons gathered around a small table wrapped in green velvet.  Some of the men showed up in shorts. I thought that was crazy because the morning was cold, but understood what they were doing when I heard one of the men say, "This is in honor of our friend, he always wore shorts."

The priest that would officiate did not look like a Catholic priest. He wore a dark robe while the stole was wide and long with gold brocade. When the prayers began, I knew he was not a Catholic priest.
A young man accompanied him and they read the prayers that included repetitious singing, reading and praying. They did the sign of the cross many times or something quite similar to our sign of the cross.

After about half an hour later they told us that the prayers were finished and the grave workers picked up the urn to place it into a white box. My nephew's wife asked to touch the urn and they brought it to her. She kissed it and began to wail; long, loud, heart wrenching crying. She was saying goodbye to her husband and that made many of us choke up. His father asked to say goodbye to the urn and he kissed it as he sobbed and whispered his farewell. Then some of the friends leaned in to also give their friend a final goodbye kiss.

The urn was placed in the box and the lid did not fit so the workers had to turn the urn on its side so the lid could be sealed. When I was asked how I was doing I got all choked up and said, "My son is not too far away." Strange that two cousins who were pals in life would now be neighbors at Mt. Olivet.

I spoke with one of the men who had prayed and he told me they were Eastern Orthodox. The Internet informed me their belief is not the traditional heaven and hell. To them heaven is loving God while hell is anyone who has no love for God. The blurb also said they do not believe in cremation and I wondered why they were picked to say prayers of interment. For whatever reasons, it was a beautiful ceremony.

Getting into my car I felt sad I drove over to my son's grave. I told him all about his cousin's burial and a quick hello to my parents and brother. May they rest in peace.

"Don't cry because it's over,

smile because it happened."

Dr. Suess